Because I Can

I'm a runner. I make ambitious goals, as soon as the heat settles, I run.

Hey, lets work out everyday this year. Day 7 rolls by; I ditch the idea. "I can't make time for that"

I'm going to write every day. I kick myself as soon as I hit writers block. "No one wants to read it anyway"

I set out to have a home birth, after hours of hard labor I tried to run. After months of telling the people around me that I could do this I'm trying to convince them I can't.

I am a runner. Depression starts to sink in, instead of seeking help, I run.

My relationship with God starts to deepen, I run. I'm a runner.

I need to change the confession of my mouth! Constantly convincing myself I am one way, even if I'm not, I will become that way. I'm radiant with my words.

In the heat of labor I ran: "It's too hard, it hurts too much and I can't can't can't do it." Literally trying to run away from my labor pains, wobbling from one side of the house to the other. Thinking and saying I couldn't possibly endure. I reversed my labor with the attitude of "I can't". From 8 inches dilated to 4 inches dilated, I made it harder on myself.

Life is the same in every aspect, when you sit there telling yourself you can't and you won't, you are literally pushing yourself back. You are reversing your progress.

I changed the confession of my mouth to make it through labor, chanting "good" and "I can". As the contractions overwhelmed my body, I gave into the pain, letting my body do what it's made to do. With each contraction I would moan "can can can can can..."

I gave birth in the way I set out to. I greeted my baby boy with such an endorphin rush, the pain drowned out. I entered into motherhood feeling as though I took it by the balls and said "I own this because I can!"

I need to apply that to every part of my life. I need to stop running when it gets hard, and instead chant "I can". I can work out every day. I can write every day. I can give birth at home. I can be a great mom. I can smile everyday. I can be a good wife. I can do whatever I set out to do! Can Can Can Can! There is no end!

No more running. No more reversing my progress. I am capable.